Happy Mother's Day!

Well this is a really hard day for me.  I am trying to be happy for the boys but I can't stop thinking of Mom.  I miss her more everyday and I feel like a little piece of my heart breaks every time I think of her. 

Mom was my best friend!  I often think of her and wish that she was there for me to call.  It has been such a tough year for me and trying to move through it without my Mom was one of the hardest things.  I thought we would travel this journey together...she promised me that she would be there for me after my surgery.  She told me that whenever I felt that I needed to call, she would be there.   But then God took her from me...I guess he thought that she would better serve me from above then here, next to me!  I remember just after my surgery when it was time to take off the bandages and remove some of my staples...I cried so hard at the sight of me...Mom hugged me close and told me it was going to be alright.  She told me that I was still beautiful and that she couldn't imagine her life without me.   Then she said, if God could take me and spare you from all this, I would want that.  God I wish she didn't say that!

Mom was here for me during my surgery and I had her for two weeks after...oh to have those moments back again.  To tell her how much I love her and that I couldn't imagine my life without her.  Little did I know that I would be faced with continuing my life without her.  I would tell her that she didn't need to worry about me, I would be ok.  That I would be strong and get through this...that I would stay positive and fight till I couldn't fight no more. 

I know that Mom is watching over me...that she is loving me and guiding me everyday.  I know that she would be proud of the woman I have become.  I can truly say that I am who I am because of my Mom...seeing her go through so much pain and suffering in her life made me the strong woman that I am today.  Seeing my Dad fight through his illness has made me the fighter that I am today.  I owe my existence to my wonderful parents...they raised me to be all I can be!  I couldn't ask for better parents!

Happy Mother's Day Mom...I love and miss you with all my heart!

If Roses grow in Heaven
Lord, please pick a bunch for me.
Place them in my Mother's arms
and tell her they're from me.

Tell her that I love her and miss her,
and when she turns to smile,
place a kiss upon her cheek
and hold her for awhile.

Because remembering her is easy,
I do it every day,
but there's an ache within my heart
that will never go away.